Yet the sense of liberty and democracy that I, sometimes, take for granted in this country is not as simple. Scraping a little into it, I find a much convoluted reality, often more difficult to comprehend and work around than in an absolute political/moral system. Women may be ‘allowed’ to do much more here but the flip side is that they still need to ‘seek permission’. So even though we have no explicit codes on dressing or our movement, the need to improvise as per the norms implicit in a certain context assures that the onus is entirely on women for their safety. It is a country where a woman is held accountable for what she wears and where she is at a certain time of the day.

Traveling or backpacking alone is vitally mentioned in any list of ‘things to do before you’re 21/30’. The idea of going off all by yourself is certainly intriguing yet more frightening to most women. Our minds are conditioned such that we’ll only dwell in the risks and threats involved. Worst is how women thrash the idea to avert the sense of guilt, that we would readily feel (courtesy our society’s mindset and attitude towards women) if things went awry in the trip.

Forget traveling alone, the greater the bunch of girls together the bigger the invitation it becomes “apparently”. I’ve had friends who were followed, photographed and in worse cases, groped by locals or fellow travelers. In a recent trip to Chandigarh, my friends and I were followed and taunted by groups of boys on different boats in Sukhna Lake. What was planned to be a relaxing item on the itinerary turned out to be a cardio burst of frantic paddling and immense irritation.

A travel buff of a friend recalls how she and her friend were followed right to their room in the resort by a bunch of men, on a recent trip to Goa. “They thought that calling us weird names in Hindi would make us fall in love with them or make us attracted towards them. Bleeeugh!”

Is it really too much to give women the pleasure courtesy to enjoy their vacation carefree?

My own traveling experience has been quite limited both for its quality and quantity with heckling for parents’ permission and being planned to the ‘t’ and under some elder’s guided protection. I’ve really not had those adrenaline rushes of adventure filled travels I’ve watched or read so much about. I’ve always envied the freedom, which men exclusively enjoy, to spontaneously take off without a care of the world on their motorcycles, stop at any Dhaba for food, crash at a crumbling motel et al.

The travel buff, indeed, has also had her share of adventure and fun. “Whether its deciding to run down the beach at unearthly hours of the morning, befriending strangers, taking motorcycle taxis in unknown places at 4am, riding through winding star lit paths or getting stranded on an island and not worrying about it and deciding to drink a few more beers instead” merrily she notes.
Traveling on your own is like a rite of passage without which no pursuit of independence and individuation is complete. Women, otherwise, are just limited to being school children with their movements and activities restricted, for a lack of better judgment, needing a hall pass to pee and a rebellious streak to bunk.

After all, why should boys have all the fun?

“Old habits never die.” Rahul Mahajan, was married to Shweta Singh after knowing her for 13 years. Shweta stood as a pillar of support during those days when Rahul Mahajan lost his father and was facing a court case. They got engaged in July 2006 and divorced on August 1st 2008. Reason domestic violence and wife beating.

Rahul Mahajan then married Dimpy Ganguly in a reality show in March 2010. On  29^th July early morning ay 4 am Dimpy had to run away in a friend’s car when she could not take any more violence from Rahul. The fight started from a trivial thing- a SMS in Dimpy’s phone which Rahul could not open.

Check out what Dimpy has to say

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/entertainment/bollywood/news-interviews/Rahul-punched-kicked-me-Dimpy/articleshow/6235699.cms

Rahul Mahajan is the son of a well known politician Mr.Promod Mahajan. Mr Promod Mahajan started his career as a school teacher and later become a political leader in Bharatiya Janta Party. Rahul Mahajan became infamous when he was hospitalized and later jailed for a drug overdose. The secretary of his father Bibek Maitra died of this overdose. Since then there was no looking back for Rahul, he married and got divorced by a Jet airways pilot Shewta Singh, participated in reality shows like Big Boss 2, Chote miyan and Swayamvar.

A wife beater and abuser by core Rahul Mahajan is leading a dignified life. Media is sensationalizing the story of domestic violence. But there is no one who is coming forward to punish him. Even his wife and ex wife are so involved about their own well being that they are not taking any measures to cage this demon. I think this is the time when media should take a lead and free our society of this human faced disaster.

Sarla ji is a community worker in Neelmatha Lucknow. She is working on different social issues with women and youths in her community.

She says that many women experience domestic violence as part of their daily lives, and often do not recognize it as such. It is about power and control and not always about physical violence

Violence against women is a serious social, criminal and community safety issue. In an average year one in ten women are known to have experienced violence from a partner or ex-partner, in Leeds alone this equates to over many women. One in four women will experience Domestic Violence at some stage in their lives.

Fleeting of Bell Bajao campaign which is promoting to halt the domestic violence through video van and on television, internet blogs is the first significant attempt to recognize domestic abuse and we can prevent easily with this act “BELL BAJAO”. The act of Bell Bajao is very simple to halt violence in home.

This is just a figment of my imagination, and imagination breeds a part of it from reality. This is happening. Not in just households where people are but illiterate, but mostly in the so-called ‘literate’ households too… high time people check on to their neighbours regular injuries. High time people looked up their neighbours when there is no sign from them for long. High time we go and check that scream…it’s High Time we realized the importance of ringing that one Bell!

If she is lucky enough, she can enjoy her child hood, always being compared to her brother and making her feel useless and inferior. She has to struggle at every phase of survival, proper education, proper nutrition, proper sanitation, the list can be enormous, not to forget the abuse from an elder brother or father.

Even before reaching adolescent she may be forced into marriage, she can face genital mutilation, forced prostitution and various forms of sexual harassment, honour killing, sex slavery…….an unending list.

Now she is married, she is not independent because her parents have never given importance to her education. Her in-laws perceive her a burden. So she has to bring dowry from her parental home. If she fails to meet their unending demand she is ill-treated, abused beaten and in extreme cases burnt to death. Death-thank god her soul can now rest in peace, but it is not always the case; she leaves behind her children. Then starts their share of misfortune.

Karl Marx have very rightly said ”Social progress can be measured by position of  female sex”. Still parents do not send their daughters to school the reasons can vary from poverty to lack of proper schools in the neighbourhood. These reasons can be over come incase of a boy but not for a girl who is considered the weaker sex.  They do not understand that education is the biggest gift a parent can give their daughter. It is the most precious dowry. A working wife brings more money and prosperity- a dowry paid in installments. In India the alarming ratio of girl:boy gives goose bumps . But still as per Darwin’s law of survival for the fittest, girls are fighting and surviving all the odds offered by the society. Their fight will continue till the last girl in the face of earth gets wiped out.

As per her “now we should try to understand exactly domestic violence is happening everywhere in society, which needs to be answered in right spirit, where a woman is forced to endure repeated domestic violence so as not to be thrown out of the house. As understood in general sense, domestic violence is violence that occurs within the private area, generally between individuals who are related through intimacy, blood or law. Despite the apparent neutrality of the term, domestic violence is nearly always a gender-specific crime, perpetrate by men against women. Thus Bell Bajao campaign for to halt domestic violence should ideally put a stop to violence, give protection against future abuse and use corrective measures to fighting continued domestic violence.”

For those who aren’t aware, an ‘honour killing’ is carried out when family members murder another family member who has brought disgrace and shame on the family. Usually, in India, it takes place over an “inappropriate” relationship or marriage outside caste or religion.

In my opinion, while the Domestic Violence Act requires review and since even women now can be prosecuted under the PWDVA, ‘Honour Killings’ should also be included with separate consequences, like the case of Sati and dowry where there are specific laws with maximum and minimum terms of punishment. There is no specific law to deal with honour killings. The murders come under the general categories of Culpable Homicide (Sec.299) or Murder (Sec.300) with punishment under Sec. 302 as stated in the Indian Penal Code.

In many cases, the victims who run away with ‘unsuitable’ partners are lured back home after FIRs are filed by their families. The police cannot be unaware that in many cases they are coming back to certain death at the hands of their relatives and fellow villagers. Yet, pre-emptive action to protect them is never taken. Undoubtedly, the virus of caste and class that affects those carrying out such crimes affects the police in the area too. But that can be no excuse to sanction murder. Active policing and serious penal sanctions is the only antidote to this most dishonourable practice.

What is also so horrible, apart from the killing itself, is how it’s carried out. The person can be burned alive, tortured, maimed, and/or beaten to death. Such extreme action, just to follow the norms of society! A large part of this problem in villages is due to the strong presence of a panchayat or informal court, which consists of members of the same caste and decides all matters relating to their community.

However, India’s most recent honour killing took place in Delhi — not a village. The parents who murdered their 19 year old daughter and her 19 year old fiancé said that they had been left no alternative. Their daughter’s deed frustrated them, and they didn’t regret killing the couple, a euphemism for doing away with anyone seen as spoiling the family’s reputation. These are socially sanctioned by caste panchayats and carried out by mobs with the connivance of family members.

Research indicates that the majority of honour killings happen in the north Indian states of Punjab, Rajasthan, Haryana, and Bihar. Honour killings are rare to non-existent in south India, and also the western Indian states of Maharashtra and Gujarat. There have been no honour killings in West Bengal in over 100 years, thanks to the influence and activism of reformists like Vivekananda, Ramakrishna, Vidyasagar and Raja Ram Mohan Roy.

The issue of honour killings really indicates the extremities of life in India — not just from rich to poor, but from cities to villages. While India’s cities are progressing at a rapid rate, and love marriages are becoming more and more prevalent, many villages are not. There, the caste system remains as strong as ever, and the reputation of the caste is of utmost importance — sometimes more important than a human life.The usual remedy to such murders is to suggest that society must be prevailed upon to be more gender-sensitive and shed prejudices of caste and class. Efforts should be made to sensitise people on the need to do away with social biases.

The fact is, you can move to the city but you still can’t escape the scrutiny and judgements of the village.

To read more here’s a TOI article- http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/India/Honour-killings-North-India-wages-a-vicious-war-against-love/articleshow/6112387.cms

He has watched the Bell Bajao PSA on TV. Initially the message of the PSA was not very clear to him. But his son helped him to understand that one should raise voice against domestic violence. He feels that Domestic violence is no more a private affair. The mistreatment is a very dreadful thing for the society.

After watching Bell bajao advertisement, he took an initiative to halt Domestic violence in his community. There was this woman who was regularly beaten up and ill-treated by her family for dowry. One day when she was being beaten up, Tiwari ji rang their door bell. Quarrel has halted for that day only. Next day it has started again, then Tiwari ji repeated his action again and again. He told us that from that day onwards violent acts has stopped. She is living with her inlaw’s family happily. Tiwari ji thanks Bell bajao campaign for this fabulous idea…

Breakthrough’s

Sharing her excitement, Mallika Dutt, Executive Director of Breakthrough says, “Breakthrough is delighted at Bell Bajao’s win at the Cannes Lions Advertising Festival 2010! The Silver Lion provides us with a global platform to spotlight violence against women and to ask men and boys to become partners in ending it.  Our partnership with Ogilvy is a wonderful example of the reach and success of public-private collaborations, which are essential to bringing an end to the abuse that women face all over the world.”

Bell Bajao! is a national campaign which uses the power of pop culture, media and community mobilization for outreach across India. The campaigns are based on true stories of people who joined the movement against domestic violence. Launched first in 2008, with the support of the Ministry of Women and Child Development and campaign ambassador film star Boman Irani, Bell Bajao! soon became a national movement. The campaign not only creates awareness on the issue of domestic violence but also rouses public sentiment to take action against it.

Zenobia Pithawalla, Group Creative Director, Ogilvy & Mather, Mumbai says”What makes this win even more wonderful, is the fact that this work was not created because one wanted to win an award. But because everyone from the client to the creative team to the film maker believed this was what it would take to put an end to Domestic Violence. As we celebrate this news, we would like to thank Breakthrough for always giving us a free hand and believing in our creative work as much as they believe in their cause”.

The Cannes Lions International Advertising Festival is the world’s biggest celebration of creativity in communications. As the most prestigious international advertising awards, more than 22,500 entries from all over the world are showcased and judged at the festival. Over 6,000 delegates from 90 countries attend seven days of workshops, exhibitions, screenings, master classes and high-profile seminars.